Stray dogs leave Commonwealth Games Village due to filthy conditions

New Delhi: After an uproar was created by the advance parties of atleast 5 countries about the maintenance and hygiene of the Commonwealth Games Village, the organizing committee is facing flak from another quarter. The stray dogs living in the village have left the village due to filthy conditions and in a strongly worded letter to the PMO, have asked for the matter to be looked into and resolved urgently. 

"We have provided all facilities to the dogs living in the village. Some last minute issues like infrastructure have to be addressed. It is a trivial matter and will be handled as such. You know, the dogs have a certain standard of cleanliness and we have a certain standard of cleanliness. Just because our standards are less than the dogs does not mean they protest like this." said Kalmadi's No.2 man, Shri Lalit Bhanot (sic)

"There are red stains on the walls, the plumbing is not working, there is a lot of garbage and stray dogs are sleeping on the beds" said a member of the scottish delegation. "In fact the dogs looked very comfortable and we fully support the claim of the CWG that the dogs are well cared for. In-fact we are not even bringing our athletes, lest the dogs be disturbed"

But the dogs have a different story to tell. " We are sleeping on the beds of the athletes and using all the facilities that they are supposed to use and frankly it is below our standards" said Maneka Gandhi, speaking on behalf of the dogs. "Mr. Gill had promised a great Indian wedding and he should stand by it. Let's have some band baja and and food. We will even share with the athletes" she added.

Various people have jumped up (pun intended) and issued statements

"All issues  ( PAUSE )  have been brought to our notice (PAUSE) ( LOOKS AT SCRIPT) and will be addressed" Said Mr. Jaipal Reddy, Minister for Urban Development

"We are going to have the best Commonwealth Games" said Mr. Kalmadi.

 "Sir, what about the dogs?" asked a reporter (@manikmahna) 

"They are going to have the best Commonwealth games."

"And the athletes?"

"Who?"

" These jokers deserve to be castrated in the middle of the road" said a decorated Ex - Army General on condition of anonymity.

"You see, it is the CWG Village. If we provide all the world class facilities then it would become a city. We do not want any change in the mandate at this late stage. The baarat is going to come and the marriage will take place. Guests or no guests" Said sports minister M S Gill.

It still remains to be seen whether the organizing committee can placate both the dogs and the athletes, in that order.

For more you can tune in to the Newshour debate with Arnab Goswami which will be attended by Suhel Seth and Chacha Chudhary's dog, Rocket.